Humor

[ФилиНН]

weaky

When psycho warriors (Almost humor in those conditions )
Warriors in the PM and such

[Вячеслав.]

It's Cho? import Substitution?

Rather,the theater of operations.

[У-Луна]

[АндрейКо]

[youtube][/youtube]

[Иван Славов]

Look at the shadow. – Said the Master to the disciple. – It does nothing, it is only a repetition, she has no face, no thoughts, and more importantly – no choice. It will always replicate only the outlines, sometimes very pale, his master. She doesn't even leave marks.
Why are you telling me, Master?
- So you don't become my shadow.

[ФилиНН]

[youtube][/youtube]
Curious bulls
Recalled. Went kayaking on the rivers of the middle band. Cows grazing on the banks. Juuti. We spit. And on the same river(some do not remember) one area(similar to) the whole herd takes off and wanders along the shore after us, while not disappear.

[АндрейКо]

[к-13]

In the house №3 on Galasinska lane lost water. Came excavator, dug up in the yard of a pit two meters tall, looking for a pipe, but not found. Workers looked into the pit, angry, spat and decided to engage with archaeology until the morning. Late in the evening uncle Mitya went home and fell into the pit. He didn't know what it is in the yard, just walked randomly and found it. However, the workers left the fence in two places — the front of the pit, and from the back, nobody imagined that uncle Mitya will come from the flanks. Once down, uncle Mitya wanted to get out in the pampas, but failed. Uncle Mitya began to shout loudly what is supposed to scream when falling into the pit. You know all those words, I will not list them. From the sounds of native speech woke up the neighbors, went to the balcony, everyone wanted to know the source of the broadcast. The living entity, trapped in a pit always causes a keen interest of his fellows. Everybody is curious how it will be to get out of there. If the creature can also swear, this show wins. Then came out of the house uncle Bob, handed the sufferer a helping hand. Uncle Mitya pulled him by the arm and dropped down on yourself. Both began to shout a duet, although a bit out of place. Uncle Mitya vinyl uncle Bob in volatility. Uncle Bob also found some arguments very convincing, mainly refers to the genetic inferiority of uncle Mitya. Then they somehow found a common language, one hoisted the other, and gradually both came to the surface of the planet. Spectators on the balconies, expecting more of the intensity of the drama, went disappointed. The next day, towards evening, working with the excavator back. It turned out that yesterday was digging in the wrong place, it became clear why nothing was found. A hole in the backyard dug and dug a new one, this time from the street. Already at a depth of five meters began to meet signs of a buried civilization, in particular the telephone cable. Cable fell victim to the excavation before its noticed. After a brief discussion, it was decided to stop there and to leave. It was evening, and difficult decisions should be taken on it. You guessed it, right? Late in the evening uncle Mitya went home. He remembered that in the yard in the earth's crust gaping six-foot hole, and decided to walk around the house on the other side. In the morning when he left the house, the pit in the courtyard was still, and outside the pit was not. Uncle Mitya did not know that in his absence, the workers came and changed the pit places. He fell down into the pit and found a torn telephone cord. If anyone knows, in the time of the call voltage of the telephone line is 110 volts, in this lies the answer to the mystery why communicators don't like to strip wires with my teeth. Uncle Mitya in the fall felt the cable by hand. Coincidentally, just at that moment someone was trying to call the house number 3 on Galasinska the alley. The cable was damaged, to the telephone call never came. Challenge accepted uncle Mitya. Once a long time ago uncle Mitya was educated electrician at a vocational school, where he was told what to do, if there is a short man with electricity. Now that I have the education he needed. Uncle Mitya issued the sounds of merging man with Horny phone line. This time he did not need the help of uncle Bob to get out of the pit. Received a charge of vivacity, uncle Mitya one leap won a convincing victory over gravity. In the previous pit he was much more comfortable. Once outside the pit, uncle Mitya imposed on archaeologists such florid curse that Tutankhamun died of envy again. All the way to the apartment uncle Mitya did, keeping one hand on the wall and feet probing the ground in front of him. Even in the stairwell, just in case he checked to touch each step. It has nothing was certain. The next morning, immediately after lunch, to the house № 3 on Galasinska lane is back working. Wanted to fall asleep yesterday's hole, but there were angry communications with the local exchange. Very angry. There was a conflict, communications suggested workers to search your pipe in a different place, near the fallopian. Working so far did not, just dug another pit, five meters to the left of the previous one. This time the pipe was found. The workers were delighted, got interested and dug a trench, long, as the mighty boa. The trench crossed the sidewalk and took even a little of the roadway. For the convenience of pedestrians across it was thrown a bridge of three boards. Below, under the boards, splashing the white sea canal. As usual, late in the evening uncle Mitya went home. Actually weekdays electrician end at six-zero-zero, after six uncle Mitya free Angela Davis. But it so happened that on Monday uncle Mitya issued a salary. Electrician is also a man, he is weak. He can't resist the temptation to buy a pint and eat it in utero. So uncle Mitya came back home late. Was the witching hour, the sky shining moon, and in the moonlight right in front of uncle Mitya suddenly appeared in the trench. If this had happened the day before, he didn't hesitate to fall into it. But today all the feelings uncle Mitya was sharp, he knew about the treachery of drobocapsule and was mentally prepared for the trenches. Uncle Mitya walked along gracefully, as miss universe on the podium, unshaven and with only fumes. Once on the other side of the podium, uncle Mitya exclaimed: Ha! Eat shrews? When wise king Solomon said, "pride goes before a fall", he was referring specifically to uncle Mitya. Blinded by pride, uncle Mitya took a few steps, and fell into the pit with a telephone cable. In just a few seconds about his adventure, I learned the whole house. Falling, uncle Mitya broke in a fragile place, and his cry put all of the expression that one can find forty electrician. On the balcony came the intrigued neighbours. Individual sounds and phrases they were able to establish the essence of what is happening, someone called an ambulance. While she went to Galasinska lane, uncle Mitya had time to enrich the Russian language with six new verbal adjectives and decline the word "pit" eleven different ways. The doctor came, shone a light into the pit by headlamp, I was amazed how low man can fall. Uncle Mitya removed from the pit and beautifully decorated in plaster. The next two months uncle Mitya its white rounded shape resembled a porcelain cat. The first week he painfully wanted to drink the rest of the time he spent dreaming to scratch. Under the plaster uncle Mitya fused to fame when he pulled out, he immediately went out and bought a half-liter. A lot of Affairs, he sought to catch up. A week later, in the house № 7 on Galasinska lane also lost water. Came excavator, looking for the pipe. Not found.

<

[У-Луна]

[АндрейКо]

In my head sometimes develop such ideas that cockroaches standing ovation...

[Иван Славов]

[ФилиНН]

[youtube][/youtube]
Ah-wah-wah! Account with such lovely recording hamster eating happened **** ...
Okay... Then (for resonance) complete post


Here's what happens if you do not think and do not limit the desires, needs

[АндрейКо]

The son complains to the father: — Dad, I met a very beautiful girl, and she asked me: — do You study at MSU? I say: No. — Do you have the Mercedes? I answer: No. — And you three-storey house? I have to say No. And she left me. Father: Well, son, you certainly can throw Oxford, and go to MSU... you Can sell the Ferrari and buy a Mercedes... But to demolish the three floors for the sake of fools, I won't!

The pessimist sees the tunnel. Optimist — the light at the end of the tunnel. Realist — the headlights of a rushing train in the tunnel. And only the engineer sees three idiots standing on the tracks!


And funny :

Today I heard my roommate begged her cat down from the tree.
Her last phrase killed all:
— Well then, ***** don't yell! Wei the nest and go to sleep!!!

[АндрейКо]

[ФилиНН]

[ФилиНН]

[Вячеслав.]

[Иван Славов]

[ФилиНН]

Different after all, is not questioned key file 10 12 !

[Вячеслав.]

Let others say how stressed I need help

[Иван Славов]

[к-13]

Achim, danced to the end of the label is not enough?)))

[Иван Славов]

K-13may and enough, but he /danced W/ the first version was skriti and then transformed to the hidden... In General, the author of this graffiti - large skritie potentsialnye opportunities...

[ФилиНН]

Yes, fuck Turkey!


The closed bathing suit with the fur lined and the Laptev sea!

[У-Луна]

Brilliant solution...

Especially if before podlivaniem melting fur sweet to eat beetles, carefully glued to the ears of the proper paperwork (you can just green, but with the right numbers), eat bugs personally-potowanimi berries - really, anyways that Libya gave up?...

Give light way - by waving magic wands...